Saga karaoke is worse than normal karaoke

([In imitation of George] currently listening to: "When the Rain Comes" by Third Day)

I learned something. Do not post immediatelyafter going somewhere or doing something. You have to let yourself simmer for a while, have to let all of your perceptions and feelings boil down into something. This is what I wanted to write last night after simmering a while, but I couldn't because I had already posted.

I realized something Tuesday night, sitting by the fire at Nordaggio's and watching all of the people studying and socializing and coffeeing. I don't need anyone's appoval. I don't need human validation to be a satisfied and fulfilled person.
I didn't mean for that to sound cold. Of course everyone needs friends, but this isn't like an "I have no friends, but I don't care, who needs those jerks anyway, I'll just hole up in my room and never shower and become the unabomber" thing. It's more like an "I don't need to look to other people for wholenesss" thing. For the first time in a long time, Tuesday night I felt comfortable in, with, and by myself. I wasn't really by myself...I had friends around me the whole night. But even if I hadn't I would've been ok. I gained a new appreciation for silence-- something I lost when I came to school-- the value of silence with friends. Here I have felt a near-frantic need to keep conversations going, light, funny. Tuesday night I remembered that it was okay, that it was better, to just sit with people and think and hum and smile.
It's a good feeling.

On a different note, I went up to the penthouse at 7 this morning to watch the sunrise. It's amazing what kind of details you can see on sunlit tree silhouettes. I swear I saw twigs at a mile distant.