Ow.

Reading 1 Corinthians is an exercise in humility.
I do not, for example, particularly want to realize that I've subconsciously accepted ignorance as faith. That when I read things in the Word that I don't like, or don't understand, or don't agree with at first glance, I've somehow convinced myself that ignoring it all is somehow a good thing.

It's not. How can I have a relationship with Christ if I brush him off? How, if I don't even bother getting to know him, or working past mistaken impressions, or refusing, even here, even with this, to be vulnerable? Where along the line did I buy into the lie that true faith is smothering the process?

I don't know. But I'm done. I'm done with passivity. I'm done with apathy. I'm done with being afraid that the Truth will somehow melt away if I am honest with my questions--that the solid Rock will shatter if I knock a few times. It is time for me to grow up, to pry open my eyes, and know in whom I have believed.

Life can roll on to something good...